Monday, June 1, 2009
Fountain Lane
The following is a series of e-mail correspondence between some renters and the management.
Dear Mr. xxxxxxx,
The Real Estate Management Company has informed me of several written complaints they have received regarding excessive noise coming from your apt. (2B). I have made several attempts to contact you in person but have been unable to do so. This message is a reminder of the lease agreement you signed which states that excessive noise will not permitted. Please respond to this e-mail.
Thank you,
Ed Dooley, Building Superintendent
Dear Mr. Building Super.
Thank you for the letter. Cappa and I apologize for the noise. We are presently soundproofing the walls of the apt. with various materials in hopes that it will insulate the neighbors from the noise. We also unfortunately must not have heard your attempts to contact us.
Sorry again,
Coon
Dear Mr. xxxxxxx,
I hope I am sending these messages to the right person. I’m not sure who Coon is?? Please understand that as part of the lease agreement you signed, you are not allowed to install soundproofing nor make excessive noise. I would like to gain access to your apt. ASAP in order to verify your understanding of the lease.
Thank you,
Ed Dooley, Building Superintendent
Dear Super,
I am answering this e-mail for Coon. We are in fact the tenants, not to worry. Also don’t worry, we are white. Coon is just a nickname we gave him a long time ago, kind of like “Racoon”. We sometimes have black friends over (hope that’s okay), but they don’t live here.
Thanks,
Cappa
Dear Coon and Cappa,
Please don’t misunderstand, I was not suggesting that you couldn’t be a minority. Our company does not discriminate. But also, we must get together to discuss the lease agreement and noise problem. Please call me ASAP at xxx-xxx-xxxx.
Thank you,
Ed Dooley
Dear Ed,
Good to hear from you. Was that your wife I spoke to on the phone? She sounds nice. The soundproofing is almost completed and we will be installing the caulking next in order to keep any odor from transmitting into adjacent apts. Sorry for the misunderstanding regarding the minorities, we thought it was okay to have minority visitors.
Coon
Dear Coon and Cappa,
I don’t think we are communicating well. First, the management company does not have a problem with minorities of any type coming to the apt. More importantly, you should not be installing any soundproofing or caulking without permission from me. Please stop immediately and contact me directly regarding this issue. And please have my secretary page me if necessary.
Thank you,
Ed Dooley
Hello Ed,
The boys have completed the soundproofing and caulking so it seems this is a moot point. The plumbing and electric is being connected today so that the plants can be watered and receive light. The noise from the dogs barking should be contained now but please let us know if the neighbors complain again. I’m not sure why anyone would complain about minorities.
Thank you for your patience,
Helen
Dear Helen, Coon and Cappa,
Do you have a cell phone number that I may contact you at. It seems there are several violations of the lease agreement that need to be discussed immediately. Do you have a dog in the apt.? If so, how many? No animals are allowed in the apts. And please stop all work until proper permission and inspection can be conducted. Also, how many people are in the apt.? I reiterate that the Real Estate Company does not discriminate against anyone.
Ed Dooley
Hey Eddie,
What’s goin on? You seemed a little freaked out in your last e-mail. And what's up with asking my girl for her cell #. Not cool Eddie. We’re just trying to keep you up to speed with the construction progress. We can understand you not wanting certain types of people loitering around the apts. but we can assure you that they are only visiting for a brief time to see the puppies. Any way, we assumed you didn’t want the plants on the balcony, which is why we renovated the back room to grow everything in doors. As far as the noise and smell goes, it should be minimized now. Our only concern now is when we let out the chickens, the dogs get a little crazy, but we’re planning on cutting that back to once a day and we’ll make a better effort of cleaning up the carcasses quickly, before they rot. Oh yes, there is only Cappa, myself and 3 girls and we are contained to one room, which is also soundproofed.
Thanks,
Coon
I attempted to gain access to the apt. today but was unable to open any of the doors. I am serving you all notice that I have contacted the town and proper authorities so that we may ascertain exactly what is going on. Please contact me immediately.
Ed Dooley
Fast Eddie,
WTF Eddie, what’s with all the drama, babe. We thought everything was cool. You can come over any time, we just keep the doors secured because of all the strange dudes hanging around. You really should beef up security. Sorry to say though, it’ll have to wait. Me and Coon and the girls are heading to Mexico for the holiday. I’m finally going to see my family who I haven’t seen since the war ended. Don’t worry about the animals, we have several friends scheduled to take care of everything. You probably shouldn’t go into the apt. until we get back, for safety reasons.
We left one of the plants you wanted outside your office. Just hang it upside down for a few days before using it.
Peace,
Cappa
p.s.- BTW Eddie, is that your car w/ the nice paint job. love the shamrock on the hood, very cool!!
I will advise the Real Estate Company that everytthing has been taken care of. Enjoy your vacation.
Ed Dooley
POSTED BY STAN
